Well, wow, um, wow ... this past Saturday, was, what happened?

We had half the time to prepare the show, the weather was really HOT, and you could cut the stress with ... well, you couldn't cut the stress with anything. Everyone pulled together like a great team should and through all the 'heated craziness,' the show not only went on, but kicked some major ass! The host Adam Devine, a really cool guy, kept his cool and made everyone laugh their asses off with his sketch, "We Made IT!" and Joyce Lee, well, we couldn't get enough of her, everyone wanted her to sing more songs including all of us backstage. All of us looked at each other and knodded our heads, "Hell yeah." And she was really cool to hang out with afterwards.

Finally, after all these years of being a part of Fries, I was able to get up on stage, I've been trying to ever since I've became involved with Fries 3 years ago; everytime I was about to, something would come up and I'd end up filling a hole, whether in the booth, front of house, backstage -- I've done everything at Fries, except act and I gotta tell ya this Saturday I was rewarded handsomely -- I played a yellow latex gloved bored guy in Colin Wilkie's sketch, "Rape Party," and a dead body with a huge erection in Dan Yate's sketch, "A Stiff One." Thanks to both you gentlemen for your brilliant casting choices. I hope I met your expectations. (HAH!)

I want to thank Jeff Huit & Dennis Hemphill with their help on, "Shirtless Dave." From backstage, it sounded like it went off really well, the laughter was deafening.

We've got another great show coming up with Brett Walkow, a hilarious guy who I've had the pleasure of knowing for the past year or so, he spun the music at our season opener on top of the Music Box Theatre and this guy can find the funny side of everything. Manda is our musical guest, who's a wonderful combination of everything good in music.

Thanks to our wonderful and ever expanding fans who beat the heat and were rewarded with tons of laughs in an air-conditioned theatre and a cold beverage in hand. Tragedy and comedy are what we all have in common. I'm blessed to be part of an amazing group who choose to represent the latter, comedy, really well!

That's all for now -- back to the job that enables me to do this ...

kendra

"Don't sweat the petty things, and don't pet the sweaty things."
-- George Carlin

I just saw that GC passed away of a heart attack over the weekend. 71 years old. He was going strong right up until the end -- he just performed a live one-hour special on HBO back in March. I'm really going to miss the guy, too.

I was weaned on comedy albums during my formative years. My parents had a fleet of LPs -- from back when comedy albums were popular to listen to at adult parties -- that included Bill Cosby, Bob Newhart, Vaughn Meader and Carlin. It was such a steady diet that it is, no doubt, what subtly led me into an ongoing career in comedy, from booking shows to performing improv and writing sketch comedy to this day.

Carlin's career in the 60's and 70's mirrored a shift in consciousness that was happening in America. He went from being a buttoned-down, necktie-wearing, straight-laced funnyman to a long-haired, blue-jeans-and-t-shirt hilarious counter-culture dude in the course of a decade. The comedic voice for an angry generation, Carlin's "Seven Words You Can't Say On TV" was the most popular tip of an devastating comic iceberg that wasn't afraid to sail full-tilt into whatever social conventions stood in its way.

The heir apparent to Lenny Bruce, he helped to push the door open wider for comedian-philosophers to step out of the darkness and onto the comedy club stages. Performers who had a message but, like Carlin, wanted to wrap it up in a way that would make it not only palatable but in a form that would be passed along at the water cooler, or on the way to work.

In his later years, his anger seemed to turn more inward but his observations were no less relevant. Less political perhaps but still biting, sarcastic and razor-sharp as he held his sardonic mirror up to society's foibles and screw-ups. He slowly evaporated from the mainstream comedy flow as younger performers, now able to more freely access the Seven Words that Carlin had helped to liberate, used them more and more gratuitously. Robbed of their shock value, those words became more or less the punctuation in a comedic language that's become more formula than content.

Carlin, having countered the culture he opposed, stayed funny lampooning the political correctness and other inane social structures that our culture had morphed into. His anger and commentary had, in the past 10 or so years, become a draw in the casinos around the country -- an ironic counterpoint between his message and the excesses going on in the very places he was performing.

Like most performers in comedy, Carlin was never one to take himself very seriously. The few times I'd had the pleasure to meet him, he was always gracious and friendly. I think he should have been celebrated more but today's media wants to only make room for what they perceive as young and hip -- when they consider someone older they only think hip replacement.

I believe that as time wears on, George Carlin's quotes and observations will continue to surface as timelessly funny, sardonic and wise commentary on the human condition. A generation -- or two -- has lost their spokesman.

As I sit in my old BMW waiting for the light to change, on the side of the road, in a wheelchair, I see a homeless man proudly peeling skin and at times tissue off of his disease ridden leg, as if showcasing his condition to the world. I immediately roll up my window.

As I make my left onto Western, two things baffle me ... why did I roll up my window and secondly, could a dollar bill save his leg?

What are his dreams about when he sleeps? ... Does he sleep? ... Did he want his leg saved or was this his way of taking pride in something that he otherwise didn't have? And is now the pinnacle of his existence, the peeling of layers, of old and new -- is this his opening gifts at Christmas time -- ripping through the wrapping and the ribbon, tossing aside the tissue paper to get to what's inside ... the gift? ... Who are his parents? ... Did he ever have a family? ... Did he ever in a million years think he would ever end up like this?

Why now am I so concerned? Or is it intrigue? I guess if it mattered that much to me, I would've stopped and asked him -- but if I did, wouldn't that be 'exploiting' him? Plus, I didn't have any cash with me ... I wonder what I'll see in my sleep ...

And now, I must write something funny ...

Dana Carvey's new HBO special, Squatting Monkeys Tell No Lies, premieres this Saturday night (June 14) on the cable channel. The show's hilarious and, if you get a chance to tune in, there's a tiny bit of footage of the audience coming in shot with a handheld camera right at the top of the show that I shot. And I also shot this bit of web promo that HBO put up on YouTube to promote the special:

Got this letter from my friend Lt. Colonel (Ret.) Bruce Gordon. He hosted the show last night, I couldn't attend due to illness. He left it on my doorstep, anchored with a can of chicken soup, and I typed it after deciphering his shaky scrawl.

Alex,

Never in all my 108 years have I had as much fun as I had last night. I've never hosted a comedy show, but I hope this one is not my last. All those wonderful kids running around like a bunch of Italians with no heads. I tell you, if I were 89 years younger, you would have a new cast member. As it stands I don't have the energy to keep up with the likes of "Fries on the Side". Let me tell you, getting to reach out to the younger generation was such a thrill. I only wish my first wife, Esther, had been there to see it. She was a pistol, and really loved the theater. She could also put her ankle behind her head, but that's never here nor there. Margaret, the current Misses, is not a fan of attention, or laughter for that matter. So she was not the best companion. The biggest thrill for me was getting to watch some of the scenes from in the back of the audience. Wow! What a spectacle. Some of those "sketches" would probably shock the average person my age (there are only 19 of us in the world) but not me. When you've killed as many people as I have, and made love to as many women as I have, not much shocks you, and the things that amuse you to the point of laughter only increase.

And so many beautiful women! Good lord, I got a tongue lashing from Margaret when we got home. She saw the lusty eye I turned toward each and every female cast member (and that darling musical guest, ha-cha!). Again, if only I were about 89 years younger...

I don't know if you know this about hosting, but it's pure fat-city my young friend. I haven't been treated that well since I freed Poland, single handed. They sent a chauffered limousine to pick me and Margaret up, and the thing was full of booze. Margaret ain't allowed on account of her pills and her angry blood, but that just meant more for me. And boy did I partake. A bevy of nubile and virginal attendants catered to my every whim (later they told me one of them was a eunuch, but I never figured out which one). There's even a separate host's green room that the riff raff aren't allowed into. I came prepared for anything, and then that nice boy Sean came and told me he would be interviewing me for the host monolog. Boy did I feel the fool! I had already written a silly and ribald little note about an Italian and a fish wife, but, as the French say, such is the life.

Alex, I was so sorry you couldn't make the show. But nobody else seemed to mind, so I didn't either. I even got to be in a "sketch". It was about some Asian girl and dragons I think. When it gets that late, I can't follow things so good.

What a feast for the senses. A delight for the mind. Democracy at it's finest. A free exchange of ideas, and artistic endeavor. These brilliant minds are truly at the forefront of a comedic renaissance. Might have had something to do with you not being there you sack of guts!

Regards,

Lt. Colonel (Ret.) Bruce Gordon

First of all - WE DID IT!!! I'm so proud of everyone who came together to make the show absolutely amazing. It was a LOT of hard fucking work and it required us to work as a complete unit - everybody gave it their all and at the end of the night audience members that I spoke with loved it.

Rehearsals - I was so busy with details leading up to the event and on the day of the event - bartenders, security, drum and amp rentals, deliveries, decorations, wristbands, crew laminates, DJ and afterparty, ticket sales, guest list, VIP's, pricing, dealing with our sponsor, record label, publicists, charity, hosts, special guests, cast, crew, volunteers, technical aspects like audio and video, the possibility of credit card sales, sound cues, music, mics, overtime, puppets, table and chair rentals, lighting, seating configurations (not to mention scheduling our regular season shows!)... well lets just say that it was SO much to deal with that when we were at the venue on the day of the show, I had waaaaaaay too much to deal with to help out in rehearsals and keep everyone on schedule. I was spread way too thin and I definitely need to learn how to delegate a little better. The problem is that I've been doing everything since the beginning of this process, so trying to hand off to someone just walking in just doesn't happen.

Long term I am going to need more help and support, and hopefully that works out this season soon. If I could do it over again I would change a few things on the production end, and I would have had at least one more rehearsal in the theatre with music and sound cues without leaving so much to chance on the day of the show. When it came down to it there just wasn't enough time for everything that needed to happen.

Actors - did a fantastic job on stage and dealing with a few new elements including mics (will get to that in a minute...). Great job this time with props and costumes. There were a few emails flying early in the day regarding props though and that should have been addressed beforehand, but for the most part all the big stuff seemed to be taken care of. Also many sketches weren't rehearsed in weeks previous because people weren't available and I can see that as being a problem this time. However, the biggest issue I saw was having people on hand and ready to go when we wanted to rehearse a sketch - we even have this problem at the SMC and it was much worse at this bigger venue where people had more places to wander off to. This season I hope that actors stay in the theatre where they belong, if you must go somewhere get it OK'd first. Since the nature of our show is hinged on that rehearsal before showtime, I don't understand why some people still don't seem to take it seriously. Again, I don't spend a lot of time backstage because I'm dealing with front of house issues, but this is the impression that I get.

The Show - I was very busy throughout the show and did not get to see everything, but here's what I can comment on: Garrett Morris - did an amazing job! I'm glad that everything worked out and we were lucky enough to have him as a host. The "20Milion Feet Under The Sea" sketch was great, and it seemed perfect for him. It looked like he was having a great time on stage, and although I didn't get to see his monologue I heard that he was great and lookied like he was having fun. I only wish that he didn't leave before the curtain call, although I understand that we were running late and he needed to go. The "Grower Not A Shower" sketch with Dennis, Dorien and Kenny pretty much stole the show. Great job Dennis on the 'car' prop that you made, it was awesome. And "The Mission" with Danny Woodburn is a personal favorite of mine - the only problem there was the damn mic on Danny... He could still be heard though, but you had to strain to pick up every word from the balcony. Oh, and "Backstreet's Back" was awesome! "Never Have I Ever" and "Almost Paradise" are also crowd favorites - friends I've spoken with between then and now all mention these as highlights. And the puppets!!! The puppets were fantastic. I hope that is something we can do again in the future, those were hilarious and everyone loved them.

Did anyone know that Poe was in the audience? She loved the show and wants to come be a part of it this season! I got a personal audition late night in the lobby; she has all kinds of amazing characters! I hope she really does take me up on my offer to be both a host and musical guest for a night this season.

And don't let me forget to mention The Kin, our musical guest on opening night. They were not only some of the coolest cats but VERY talented - I had an emotional moment standing offstage during their first performance of the night and it suddenly hit me that we did it... it's hard to explain but let me tell you that I've put so much into opening night and it took a while to sink in that we were actually there doing it. Also I want to mention our sponsor Snow Queen Vodka for helping make the night happen and the charity Charity:water for raising our awareness and giving a good cause for us to contribute to.

Mics - I wish to God there was something more we could have done about the Lav mics - it seemed like certain people were not mic'd properly in nearly every sketch, and the levels were all fucked up. At one point the Special Events Manager of the theatre came to me concerned that some actors had "thrown" one of the lavs down and then dropped another in orange juice... I still have not been able to get a clear story on this but I hope that everyone treated the equipment with respect even if they were frustrated. I've heard a few different things from actors and tech crew, and it seems like a better use of our rehearsal time could have helped to troubleshoot some of those issues, although when it comes down to it I think the house guys were not doing everything they could to manage the issue.

Volnunteers - thank you to our wonderful volunteers! And curse those of you who flaked on us last minute. We rely so much on our volunteers, who basically make up our production crew, I don't know how we would have gotten the show where it needed to be without them. Our teleprompter person flaked on us the day before the show and that was a stressful situation - thank you Jon Brooks for stepping up to the plate and doing a fantastic job. Thanks to our Ushers Dan Yates, Michael Yager and Spencer Jones. Thanks to my ticket personnel Stacy Sills, Ken Kaufman and Robin Borba. Thanks to our backstage heroes Lindsey Stancliff, Kate Bishop, Colin Wilke and Tom Morgan, and a special thank you to Tanya Bershadsky who gave up a day on her own production to come help with ours.

Afterparty - I have to mention the rooftop afterparty with the very talented and hilarious DJ Brett. By the time I made it up there it was already midnight, but it really was a beautiful space and a great way to celebrate our great accomplishment with friends.

Well, we certainly learned a lot and have a long ways to go, but the bottom line is that our show is strong enough to hold it's own on a big stage. And what a stage! The venue - Music Box @ Fonda - is absolutely incredible and I am honored that we were able to perform there. We worked for days on end with the amazing Special Events Manager Sarah Quigley in putting the night together, and it was an extremely huge task that I took on enthusiastically... although at times I was wondering what the fuck I had gotten myself into. It's a full time job!!! Not to mention my real full time job that actually pays me to work, and oh yeah being a single mom too, but that's a story for another time.

THANK YOU: Shane Elliott, for creating this amazing show and believing in all of us to realize your vision. You work tirelessly and are genuinely committed to every single aspect of this show. I am proud to be a part of it and to have the opportunity to work with you. Sarah Quigley with the Music Box, for your patience, diligence and hard work and making our dreams a reality. Kendra, for being supportive in every single way (technically, morally, emotionally, physically), for drying my tears, laughing with and not at me, and for being a completley unbiased sounding board whenever I need it. Jeff Huit, for waking up at the ass crack of dawn to pick up our fancy laminates (without you none of us would be able to get into the theatre for the show) and for being so supportive of me for the past three years. To Jay Phillips and Eyal Zinder for their amazing talents on the light and sound board, to Stage Manager Lindsey Stancliff for literally being thrown into the Fries fire and pulling together an amazing show, to photographer Jim Ewing and videographer Tommy Everman, and to every single writer and actor this season - I'm excited to work with you all again!

Through this process I have learned so much about myself, our show, the people involved, and what a lot of hard work and determination will get you. I really do feel like after this we can accomplish anything, so bring it on bitches!!! I'm proud to be a part of this group for such a monumental season and promise to give you everything I've got.

Now if you'll excuse me, it's back to work ;)

With love, exhaustion, and admiration,

Julia Henry
Show Producer.

Terrible to be starting the new Fries season so far away from the action, so far away from the writing. Been working on a funny business book that's been eating my brain but, since a publisher's already bought it, gotta get it done!

My point of writing THIS blog entry is to find out if anyone is going to post how last night's big season opener went! Come on! How about a play-by play (or scene-by-scene) for those of us Fries Faithful who were unable to make the trek to the show?

Thanks!

Jeff Huit here.

Is it time to do all this again? Can't we just do the sketches we wrote in season one? Weren't they all gems? Marc, Kenny -- am I remembering it wrong?

As a long-time listener, first-time caller (okay that doesn't actually work here), I relish the few weeks before we kick off a new season. Even though we're all friends (in some cases, good friends) we generally blow each other off when we're not doing the show (except for the random holiday party). So it's nice to see all their smiling faces again.

Except I'm not in LA right now! So I can't see their faces! Except on the Fries website, where Dorien's face is still bleeding. Have no fear -- I'll be back in time for the shows though, where I'll get to stare into the eyes of every single one of them.

But writing sketches from so far away, out of my element and away from the comraderie (sp?) that fuels great writing, is impossibly hard. I've managed to write one sketch (ie. piece of crap) on my own. One. That's pathetic. I should have a half-dozen written so that I've got backups for the lean weeks.

Luckily, I'd written one with Dennis Hemphill that is being considered, and that's a beautiful gem. So let's hope that gets a shot on stage this year, eh? If not, I'll change the title and resubmit it otherwise unchanged :) That could work.

So -- see everyone at the big SEASON OPENER! You can leave your awesome at home -- I'll bring enough for everyone. Booyah!

End of blog.

Like a vagabond, I have jumped the train of Fries that has been a long time runnin'. I joined the writing staff here a little after halfway through last season, so I'm excited to start this one from the beginning. I am amazed at the momentum Fries has as we are all about to be hurled into the new season. The writers have been furiously penning sketches of epic quality during the off-season...or the day before it needs to be finished and we've got some great material to kick off the awesomeness that will be the openning night event.

I'm trying to collaborate more with other writers and actors this season because, as an ensemble, I like to feel like a show is a group effort. I've been writing with wonderful people such as the magnificent Alex Enriquez and the majestic Dennis Hemphill already. When twisted minds get together, magic happens.

I've been keeping myself busy in the off-season. I'm still finishing out my Junior year at Pepperdine, I went on a Caribbean cruise, my first cruise by the way which was pirate-tastic, I've read some good books, and I'm in a production of Hamlet at Pepperdine. However, my premise book has not collected dust on the shelf. It's a moleskin pocket book of sturdy quality that I carry with me at all times. I write things down whenever funny happens around me or in my mind. If a stranger were to pick it up and try to decipher my markings, it would make no sense. But to me, it is a complicated map to the Holy Grail and I'll thank Sean Connery if he would please call me "Junior" from now on (or Joonyuh, if you do his accent).

One thing I particularly like about the writing staff is their flexability and aptitude to get things done under any sort of strange circumstances. It's harder for a writer, when one can't attend as many meetings as one would like to because you don't get face to face notes and you can't see the reaction to certain crucial parts. To make it work, a writer has to be completely committed to call around and ask how the meeting went. I even go so far as to have fellow writers individually read a sketch of mine and get feedback if I'm not able to go to a meeting. Another reason I like co-writes when I can't attend a meeting is that the other person can bring the sketch and "represent".

Season Six is going to be great. We have such a sense of unity coming off the glory of the Best Of Shows and we're on fire. So come see us this season, if you're not allergic to fire.